Okay! So I haven’t been the regular blog posting author and this blog hasn’t had its best year. But this is as Frosty as Frost can get.
The holidays are definitely the most confusing of times. You are either planning your vacation and get confused with a dozen options. Or you are planning a party and go bonkers. Or if you are Indian you have a dozen weddings to attend and would definitely not want to repeat your attire!
While the rest of the world is confused about wrapping paper and finding the perfect party delight, I decide to do follow my heart. My heart says “Spend a Lazy Week!!!” and so be it!
Lazy Week starts today (25/12). And what is it all about? Sleep, eat, procrastinate and laze around. A lazy mind is the devil’s workshop. And I have to agree. That explains a lot of things. Mostly that I have been extraordinarily naughty (am sure at least Sailu will have to agree! That woman, she makes me go weak in knee ;)) the rest of my minds work is listed below.
Well this is one of my favorite. And if I can have my way through I might as well get it done. The parents will most of the time reflect “oh no! She isn’t even serious about anything in life, so even contemplating about becoming serious will be a groundbreaking impossible mission blah blah blah.”
So to prove myself, I start on how I am extremely serious about the Lazy Week. And then this strikes me. I don’t want to be Jayasree Bhargavan any more. I mean I have had the name for a quarter of century and I like it. But I want something more fun. Like Calvin! Or Tweety! And then I figured it out. The only name I could associate myself with was Shadow Da’Sparrow (sounding “Shadow the Sparrow”). Apt. I lurk in the shadows of the darkest night, am nocturnal and have the attention span, patience and perseverance of the sparrow. And guess what, if you are a friend, you really can’t spot me when you want to – just like a sparrow, but you know I am there – just like a shadow. (I should really start dialogues for serials.)
So I break the news to the folks. If they ever had any thought of me metamorphosing into being a good daughter, they have now concluded that I am nothing more than an embarrassment. I should not be allowed out of home and am extremely hazardous to the wellbeing of all man kind.
I shall henceforth (not legally though) be known as Shadow Da’Sparrow. (I could even start writing the chronicles/adventures of Shadow Da’Sparrow ala Don Quixote)
So this friend of mine, the best friend rather, my soul mate, Babbloo has gone to the extent of ranting about his life so much that his parents decide to show him that things can get worse. They decide to get him married. Lol! And everything is almost fixed. Families are all aware and approve. The whole community knows of this, except for Babbloo! Obviously this causes paranoia. And like my most obedient pet, he comes running to me when in times of trouble. I tell him to go have fun, eat some bhajji-sojji, ask the girl to sing and dance, chat away and be a good boy. And for company if need be, Shadow Da’Sparrow will be more than willing to go and eat some bhajjis.
And this was what made Babbloo look up to the good things in life. Apparently no man in his senses would want to have bhajji with Shadow Da’Sparrow or someone with a name so hatke (read ‘mokkai’, its ok if you don’t understand this part.) And so he decides to rename himself to Vinay the Pooh! (though I don’t think that it comes anywhere close to Shadow Da’Sparrow). This makes me extremely wanted by two families.
(if you know this guy, you shall refrain from making any comments/hints to him on this topic. Shadow Da’Sparrow will not spare anyone who makes any such effort!)
Now about Lazy week. I recommend it all people. Everyone must do this. It’s all about sleeping 18+hours, skipping baths (spare if someone actually pours a bucket of water over your head); sometimes even skip brushing your teeth. It is about keeping everything with in hands reach, or calling out and getting that much needed glass of water, or maybe even call for help to switch on the lights, just so you don’t get out of bed. It is all about letting the bed be your cocoon.
You may need extremely tolerant and patient family member/roommates for it. You may also need to move/have a TV in you room, a big side table to hold your laptop/water/food (this is really not needed if u are a seasoned lazy person). And you should love procrastinating.
I would love to have written about this later, but I need to – just so I know I didn’t completely be lazy and my be-lazy plan actually failed (like the others did).The plus side for all this is well, my brains are definitely working well, even better than ever before and my family is more than happy that I am staying out of their hair.
For those of you still alive out there, Merry Christmas & Happy New Year.
Stay Alive and Stay Lazy.
Shadow Da’Sparrow will not be available on phone, email, social networks or in person until after the new-year’s. All of the above are working fine; its just Shadow Da’Sparrow is too lazy to even bother.